Date: Fri, 08 Sep 2000 14:46:52 GMT
From: "Sue & Rodel Padua" <>
Subject: Re: 2000 Viggen

What, no fuzzy dice? "Jack B" <> wrote in message > Jeffrey Angler <> wrote: > > I recently got myself a Viggen convertible, boy is it great. However, I > > am looking to sharpen it up even more, any ideas on how to make it a > > show car? > > Yes. Follow my easy-to-understand guide, and you will be > "showing" your sharp car in no time. > > 1) Ride height. It's obvious that the Viggen sits too high. > The best (and cheapest) way for you to fix this is to > cut a couple of coils out of your springs. You can also > clamp a few on the coils shut. A good guideline for this is > that you should not be able to see the top edge of the tire > when the car is at rest. > > 2) Lights and excitment. You will need to pick up some "Blue Flame" > bulbs at the local NAPA. It says they are not legal for road use, > but they only put that on there to keep dorks from buying them. > Open your hood and remove your exising bulbs. Replace with the > "Blue Flames". > > You will also want to put a neon license plate front and rear. > Normally, this would put a strain on your electrical system. > Luckily for you, the Viggen is chock full of unnecessary > "knock sensors" and "trionics" that you can disconnect, freeing > up power for the neon and your stereo (see below). > > 3) Wheels. How could such a cool car come with such gay wheels. You'll > want to take them off and replace with Boyd's Billet Custom wheels. > There is a spacer available that will let you use the same wheels > as a Chevy IROC-Z. > > 4) Stereo. Everyone knows that Saab radios are fruity and only > really work when they are tuned to NPR. You can't afford an > embarrassment like that when you're jammin' at the local strip. > Nor will traditional "boom tubes" fit. Luckily for you, there's > an answer. Under the hood of your Viggen, under the plastic cover, > you will see a variety of tuned induction and other tubes. > Pull the ones that connect to the engine off and install a set > of long-travel cone speakers at their ends. You can use acoustic > tile cones to account for the difference in diameter. Now your > entire car will be boomin'. You may notice that it is more difficult > to start the car in the mornings - that's because Saabs are not > particularly reliable. Don't go to your dealer, he doesn't know > what the hell he's doing. > > 5) Accessories. JC Whitney makes a kit that relocates the annoying > console-mounted key to the dashboard and gives you a full-sized > cupholder where the key used to be. You'll need that. > Also of interest would be a nice pinstripe or two down the barren > flanks of the Viggen. > If you have sufficient patience, it is possible for you to airbrush > your name on the back plastic window. Put your name on the left side, > and your baby's momma's name on the right. Don't reverse this, it would > mean that you are a pansy, unless you are in England, in which case > it's mandatory. > Gold-plated Saab insignia add to the classiness of the car. There > is also a chromed panel which goes between your door molding and > the bottom molding. It's available with big VIGGEN letters, and also > with "PLAYER". > Oh yeah, gold-plate the grille, too. > > > That's about all I can think of. I look forward to seeing you at the > next "Boomin' Saab" show. So far, the only participants have been > me (and my chopped-and-channelled 92) and my buddy Darren, who has > a sweet lowered-and-skated 99 EMS, but we're not highfaultin' and we > always welcome another Saab customizer! > > >

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