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Date: Fri, 08 Sep 2000 14:51:30 GMT
From: Jeffrey Angler <>
Subject: Re: 2000 Viggen

no fuzzy dice, and i dont think i'm gonna follow any of the other advice listed below, because it will make a beautiful car look like a freakmobile. Sue & Rodel Padua wrote: > What, no fuzzy dice? > "Jack B" <> wrote in message > > > Jeffrey Angler <> wrote: > > > I recently got myself a Viggen convertible, boy is it great. However, I > > > am looking to sharpen it up even more, any ideas on how to make it a > > > show car? > > > > Yes. Follow my easy-to-understand guide, and you will be > > "showing" your sharp car in no time. > > > > 1) Ride height. It's obvious that the Viggen sits too high. > > The best (and cheapest) way for you to fix this is to > > cut a couple of coils out of your springs. You can also > > clamp a few on the coils shut. A good guideline for this is > > that you should not be able to see the top edge of the tire > > when the car is at rest. > > > > 2) Lights and excitment. You will need to pick up some "Blue Flame" > > bulbs at the local NAPA. It says they are not legal for road use, > > but they only put that on there to keep dorks from buying them. > > Open your hood and remove your exising bulbs. Replace with the > > "Blue Flames". > > > > You will also want to put a neon license plate front and rear. > > Normally, this would put a strain on your electrical system. > > Luckily for you, the Viggen is chock full of unnecessary > > "knock sensors" and "trionics" that you can disconnect, freeing > > up power for the neon and your stereo (see below). > > > > 3) Wheels. How could such a cool car come with such gay wheels. You'll > > want to take them off and replace with Boyd's Billet Custom wheels. > > There is a spacer available that will let you use the same wheels > > as a Chevy IROC-Z. > > > > 4) Stereo. Everyone knows that Saab radios are fruity and only > > really work when they are tuned to NPR. You can't afford an > > embarrassment like that when you're jammin' at the local strip. > > Nor will traditional "boom tubes" fit. Luckily for you, there's > > an answer. Under the hood of your Viggen, under the plastic cover, > > you will see a variety of tuned induction and other tubes. > > Pull the ones that connect to the engine off and install a set > > of long-travel cone speakers at their ends. You can use acoustic > > tile cones to account for the difference in diameter. Now your > > entire car will be boomin'. You may notice that it is more difficult > > to start the car in the mornings - that's because Saabs are not > > particularly reliable. Don't go to your dealer, he doesn't know > > what the hell he's doing. > > > > 5) Accessories. JC Whitney makes a kit that relocates the annoying > > console-mounted key to the dashboard and gives you a full-sized > > cupholder where the key used to be. You'll need that. > > Also of interest would be a nice pinstripe or two down the barren > > flanks of the Viggen. > > If you have sufficient patience, it is possible for you to airbrush > > your name on the back plastic window. Put your name on the left side, > > and your baby's momma's name on the right. Don't reverse this, it would > > mean that you are a pansy, unless you are in England, in which case > > it's mandatory. > > Gold-plated Saab insignia add to the classiness of the car. There > > is also a chromed panel which goes between your door molding and > > the bottom molding. It's available with big VIGGEN letters, and also > > with "PLAYER". > > Oh yeah, gold-plate the grille, too. > > > > > > That's about all I can think of. I look forward to seeing you at the > > next "Boomin' Saab" show. So far, the only participants have been > > me (and my chopped-and-channelled 92) and my buddy Darren, who has > > a sweet lowered-and-skated 99 EMS, but we're not highfaultin' and we > > always welcome another Saab customizer! > > > > > >

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