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All those responding to this have some good points.
Here's my $0.02.
My eldest is in her second semester of college, so I've been a ways down this road. In her case, she worked hard in HS and got mostly B's (except in Math--barely a C--which was only just passing at her HS) and did lousy on her SATs, even with SAT-specific tutoring. She wound up at a competitive college that doesn't consider SATs and is doing fine. But she had the luxury of knowing what she wants to do and focused on that in her admissions essay.
In your case, it sounds like your daughter may not be thinking beyond high school. Lots of kids are like this, and doing well on SATs is no indication of anything other than being able to "test well." Does she have an idea of what she might want to major in? Any idea of future career? If so, that's great, but relatively few high school juniors have any real idea of that stuff.
If she does have any kind of inkling, have her find out which colleges have good programs in those fields. Then go visit them. The "college tour" is a lot of fun and can be very motivating for students who seem apathetic. When you take her around, make it fun. She may not have anything in particular she is passionate about. This is also not unusual. After all, lots of kids change their major a couple of times while in college because they are trying to figure out what's right for them. There's nothing wrong with going to college without declaring a major until one has a few courses behind them.
What is really important is to talk with her teachers *now* to see if you can identify why her grades vary so much and what you can do to help the situation. There can be lots of reasons, and many have fairly straightforward solutions. But you have to talk with her teachers--you gotta be proactive on this stuff and then work with your daughter to address the issues. Despite her good SATs, colleges WILL want to see decent grades.
If the money is an issue, consider a state school or even a community college for a year or two while she figures things out. This can help make up for variable grades in HS. She may be better taking a year or two off to work before college. And remember that college is not for everyone. And IMHO, where one goes for undergrad isn't all that critical. Grad school is more important, but over time it is accomplishment that makes the difference, not where the degree came from.
This WILL all sort out, frustrating as it may be. Your job as a parent at this point in her life is less to direct/control and more to be a coach/sounding board for her ideas. Suggest and recommend, and back that up with reasoning, but all you can really do is steer her a bit. As you no doubt know, people are gonna do what they're gonna do--our kids included.
Good luck and keep us posted.
Noel
, Mon, 2 Apr 2007 21:17:02
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