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My fellow Saab friends, I am in such pain right now. I have been all week. I've been sick, throwing up, and have lost 5 pounds since Saturday. My girlfriend of FIVE YEARS has left me, and now I am just wondering if she will come back to me.
What can I do to win her back? She said she'd call on Sunday to tell me what's up. I was thinking of doing some reverse physcology on her because my buddies, both guys and girls, think that she doesn't call me or anything because she knows she has me AND that I would take her back no matter what. When she calls on Sunday, I was thinking of just telling her, "Lissette, I'm sick of this. Just don't call me, I have to get on with my life." And just hang up on her before she can say anything. This will apparently make her feel that I may be leaving and that she may be losing what she had and this would help her realize that she is messing up more quickly. So I keep on giving her the cold shoulder until one of the voicemails she leaves she says that she wants me back.
Anyways, below I pasted e-mails I sent to my friends who are away from town which is pretty precise on the entire situation and what is up. So please, Saab friends, read it if you'd like and share with me your opinions.
Thanks, and Happy Thanksgiving.
Jose
We were both at FIU (our university) doing a presentation and afterwards I was in the Saab with her driving her back to her car, on the other side of campus. As we approach her car she tells me she has to tell me something and then starts crying on my shoulder. I immediately knew what she was going to tell me since the last two weeks I have been getting a different vibe from her. She basically said that with all of the weddings we have been attending lately more and more people are telling her (she has made some friends since she started FIU) that she should see other men since I am her first. I mean, people have been telling her that for quite some time, but she just shrugged it off since she never felt the need to see somebody else, until last Wednesday (not of this week, but the previous one) this guy named Jared started sitting next to her during lunch. I have no problem with Lissy having guy friends, just like she has no problem with me having girl-friends, but she told me that everytime he sits next to her that she gets butterflies in her stomach and that she can't eat and gets all nervous, like a crush. She said that this guy isn't attractive or ugly, just looks normal, but that she feels she bonds with him on an emotional level when they talk.
Basically what she wanted was to get more involved with this guy, WHILE I was still her boyfriend, to see if her feelings were right, or just the product of having too many people and weddings pressuring her into seeing other men. Obviously I told her that wouldn't work, and that I understand her need to make sure that I am truly the one for her, so we parted ways. This was amongst the most difficult 30 minutes in my life. We were both crying and it was terrible. She said this isn't goodbye and that I am still the love of her life but that she never had feelings for another guy before and wants to further investigate what the feelings are, if they are BS or for real. She said that perhaps this will make us stronger and better prepared for the next step.
I got home and threw up for the first time in years. I couldn't sleep, I felt sick, which I still do. i threw up last night's dinner, have no appetite, and I'm very pale. I feel like shit.
I understand her situation, but I question WHY? Why now, after 5 YEARS, she feels this way. I mean, I am sure guys have hit on her before, but what is it about this 5'8" guy that makes him special. Apparently, he too has a very ill grandmother and Lissy feels they bonded on this!!! Why would Lissette put a perfect 5 year relationship on hold to find out if this complete stranger, whom she's known for 2 weeks and doesn't even have a number.
She said she couldn't hide this from me any longer, since I have approached her a few times the last week asking why she is acting diffrently. She before used her grandmother's poor health as an excuse, which I accepted, but that wasn't the case.
I immediately felt a lack of affection on her part, which coincided exactly with the time she met Jared.
My question to you is:
Is this just a silly thing she is going through and will she realize how special what we have is? Will she come back to me? All the people I spoke with tell me that although there is a slight chance Lissette may never come back to me, the most probable event is that she realizes Jared is just a crazy mix of confused emotions and that Lissette will come back to me.
I am going on a cruise tomorrow, which I have honestly considered canning, but I would be selling out on my friends and it is too late for any type of refund and they and my parents say I need the cruise to relax. (UPDATE, I DIDN'T GO ON THE CRUISE)
Saabers, what is your take on this?
posted by 152.163.1...
, Fri, 29 Nov 2002 12:24:30
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